Trigger Warning: Abuse, Am I That Weird Jealous Ex to Her?

Am I that weird jealous ex to her?

In whispers of darkness, shadows dance,

Two souls caught in a tragic trance.

I see her now, weary eyes, 

The same sad story, no surprise.

I want to tell her she looks poorly,

But am I just seen as that weird, jealous ex?

I want to tell her she deserves more,

But am I just seen as that weird, jealous ex?

Her smile, a mask, fragile and thin,

A façade for the pain within.

I know that hurt, I've walked that line,

But will she see, or dismiss my sign?

I want to tell her I've felt that sting,

But am I just seen as that weird jealous ex?

I want to tell her her heart can sing,

But am I just seen as that weird jealous ex?

The nights I cried, the days I hid,

The love I thought I needed, I outbid.

I broke free from those chains so tight,

Yet she remains, dimming her light.

I want to tell her she has the strength,

But am I just seen as that weird jealous ex?

I want to tell her she'll find her length,

But am I just seen as that weird jealous ex?

In her silence, I see my past,

The hope that love can make it last.

Yet here I stand, a ghostly trace,

A reminder of a fallen grace.

I want to tell her she can escape,

But am I just seen as that weird jealous ex?

I want to tell her she can reshape,

But am I just seen as that weird jealous ex?

Perhaps my words would fall like rain,

Unwanted, drenching her with pain.

I'll be the shadow that haunts her light,

Just that weird jealous ex, out of sight.

But still, I'll hope and silently pray,

She finds her voice, she finds her way.

And if my whispers ever break through,

She'll see she's worth the world anew.

I want to tell her she's not alone,

Though I'm just seen as that weird jealous ex.

I want to tell her, her heart's her own,

Even if I'm that weird jealous ex.

I want so badly to tell my exes partner to leave. I can see my abuse has blurred into her own. I'm scared for her and I just hope she sees this poem and comes to the realisation that I'm not jealous, why would I want to go back to abuse? I want her freed too from the abuse. Much love to you if you are reading this. ♡ 

- Aspen